March 30th, 2006

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Radioactive Baked Bean Reparations

My dream this morning featured the United Kingdom stealing hundreds of millions of gallons of radioactive baked beans (laced with tritium!) from Iraq for war reparations. They were mixing them in giant open-air tanks with sour cream for sale world-wide in order to recover debts.

British scientists were testing the baked bean and sour cream concoction to prove it was safe for human consumption by, among other tests, using it as shampoo and body-wash then leaving it on for several days to judge radiation levels.

Either the US or the UK used nuclear weapons in Iraq which contaminated the baked beans. Despite the radiation they were still very valuable to the Iraqis.

After that there was something about the ٭ character, text messages and email boxes.